525600 Minuets
by frayed1989
Summary: Season 2. Spike tells his unlife story to Buffy after she stumbles upon him in the factory in his wheel chair. What starts out as useless banter becomes more of a revelation of the feelings between them.


**Five Hundred Twenty Five Thousand Six Hundred Minuets**

"Five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minuets. Minuets spent on the ground. Minuets spent looking up. Watching as days turned into nights. Nights turned into days. Watching as people died in front of me. Watching as people bled before me. Watching as souls passed on when mine couldn't. When my own soul was not inside me but trapped, gone forever and damned. I watched so much destruction all in one year. All five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minuets I watched.

In that first year I learned. I honed my senses. I defined my abilities. I became faster, stronger, more free then when I was alive. In that first year I had become the scourge of Europe. One of the most feared vampires. In that first year I had made a name for myself. Something I hadn't done for the twenty four years I had been alive. In those five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minuets, my old self, William the Bloody Awful Poet, sensitive weak William, he was gone and buried along with my mother's ashes.

That's another thing. In that first week of my turning, I had turned my mother. I loved my mother very much when I was human. And I continued to do so when I died. My mother was a sickly old woman always on the brink of death but she always held out for me. Wanted to make sure I was married and settled down with a child before she past. And I believe had I not been turned she would have fought death with her small frail fist till I was married and had sired an heir. I mean sired as in my wife had given birth. Not the sire you think of now.

So, one night, I had convinced my dark princess, my black goddess, to come back with me to my old home and there I introduced her to my mother. She seemed turned off by the idea of my mother joining us. But I begged her and she finally agreed. I remember that night perfectly as if it had only happened a moment ago. My mother had been so happy to see me even though she was put off by Dru in the room. She had walked in finding Dru and me in quiet a tussle. But she was glad to see that I was well and as she thought alive. And I was more than happy to indulge in her fantasy for a few quiet moments before I turned her. I wanted to give her eternal life. I wanted her to be healthy and strong and happy as I was. The next night Dru and I had planned on a feast on the servants of the house as we were to celebrate my mother's turning.

Now, you know that when one sires a vampire, they have a sexual bond between the sire and childe. Unfortunately, I did not understand this concept and I thought my mother and I would return to the natural way of things. Her as my mother and not my lover. Dru knew this. Maybe that's why she had been so turned off by the idea of my turning my own mother. So that night was quite a shock. She came on to me after telling me how weak and useless I was when I was human.

Before I go on, you must understand the predicament I was in. You see, I had some how managed to keep William with in me. William was pure. William was innocent. William had one of the purest, most innocent, soul that there was. The fact is while my demon took over, my demon could not drive my soul away. I believe I retained most of my former human, soul carrying self. Hence why hearing everything my mother said hurt me greatly when I should have just laughed it all off with her.

So, I did what I only could do. She wasn't my mum any more. She wasn't the woman how gave birth to me and loved me. Maybe that's why I changed her. While I had that strong bond with my black goddess and loved her greatly already, I didn't know if she would love me. And I wanted to be loved. I always have wanted to be loved. One of my weaknesses." He paused, eyeing the strong beautiful creature that sat in front of him now, listening intently as he poured out his un-life story to her. How he got in this position of sitting in his wheelchair with the slayer only inches away he had no clue. One hundred twenty years ago she would have been as good as dead by now. Maybe it was the fact that some how within the past week of watching his dark princess and the poofster together had brought out the old meek William. Or maybe it was the fact that the seventeen year old girl sitting in front of him was the one who put him in the damned wheel chair in the first place.

"Well? What happened next? What did you do? Did you stake her? Or did you slice her? Torture her? Come on! I want details!" Buffy said, motioning her hands in the air as she stared at him.

"Hey! That was my mum. My mum! I'm not going to torture her or slice her up!" Spike cried, outraged and appalled. "I don't think I should tell you anymore. This is unnatural." Buffy giggled, smiling at the way his face contorted with distaste. His eyebrows scrunched together and his nose scrunched upward showing wrinkles while his tongue showed between his lips. He raised his eyebrows, titling his head as he watched her giggle. As her green eyes brightened and her whole face lit up much like a child when you have given them a new toy or a puppy.

"Please? If you keep telling the story, I won't stake you till your up and about!" Spike growled low, rolling his eyes in annoyment.

"Oh! Ruin the moment why don't you. Bringing up the whole staking me and pointing out that I'm stuck here in the damned contraption."

"Aww, come on! It's not that bad. When I was little and still wasn't afraid of hospitals, me and my cousin used to steal the wheelchairs and have races down the halls." Spike smiled.

"The slayer's afraid of a hospital? Anything else you afraid of?"

"Tons! Not that I'm telling you any of them. But yea, I'm afraid of hospitals." Spike could only chuckle lightly as her smile turned into a frown as she glared at him. "You'd be afraid of hospitals too if you were a little girl and saw you're best friend slash cousin be eaten by a demon you couldn't see!" she yelled, crossing her arms over her chest and turning away from him. Spike sighed, wheeling closer to her as he put his scarred hand on her shoulder. She jerked away from him, glaring at him icily. "I hate you."

"Feeling's mutual. Listen. I'm sorry I upset you. It sucks that your cousin was killed but it happened. There's nothing you can do about it. You can only hope that it will never happen to any other kid out there."

"It can't. I killed it last year and – hey! Were you just comforting me?" At this, Spike jerked away from her as if burned.

"No! I was not comforting you. I just didn't want to have to sit here and listen to you pout and complain." Buffy smiled, shaking her head lightly.

"Always has to be something in it for you right?"

"Damn straight! Hey, are we actually having a conversation?" Buffy looked around the empty factory, filled with boxes that had held the previous alive now dead judge.

"I think we are." She paused, sighing as she looked around, noting how empty it seemed to be. "Must be lonely here," she whispered, looking at the crippled vampire in front of her.

"It is. But you get used to it I guess. S'not like I can do anything about it. Being trapped in a wheelchair doesn't really help you know?" Buffy nodded, tracing the blue veins on his hand. Her breathing began to slow and her eyes became heavy. Spike noticed the change quickly and could only smile. "Tired pet?" Buffy nodded, trying to stifle a yawn.

"I should go. The gang and my mom will worry and I really don't want to run into Dru and Angel-" she paused, taking a deep breath. "Angelus." Spike frowned as her fingers stopped. She looked blankly at the floor, rubbing one hand up and down her injured arm.

"If it helps, I know you're pain. I know what its like to think you know someone only to have them hurt you later on. If it helps, the person who did it to me had a soul." Buffy smiled gently at him.

"You forget, mine had a soul too and I was the one that took it away." One tear traveled down her cheek, fallowed by another, silent tears. He could only sit and watch, not sure of how to act, wondering how in the few moments she had entered his home they had reached this spot. Her hand touching his in a light caress meant only for those she loved, crying over a love long lost. "I ruined it all, didn't I? You wouldn't be sitting in a wheelchair if it weren't for me. You'd be with Dru and I'd still have Angel. God, am I that bad?" Spike sighed, wrapping his arm around her waist and using his upper body strength to pull her into his lap and hold her. She melted welcomingly into his embrace, resting her head on his hard chest, closing her eyes, listening to him as he took in breaths and let them out as if he were alive. The only thing that was missing was the pounding heart. That was the only thing keeping her from fantasy. The only thing keeping her real.

"Not bad. Never bad," he whispered, resting his cheek against her golden hair. In the few seconds that fallowed, the two mortal enemies, the vampire and slayer, found contentment in holding each other and waiting for the sun to rise or for the sire and childe to come back. And as Spike held her in his arms and felt the change in her breathing, he knew she had fallen asleep in the safety of his arms. The thought that she trusted him enough to fall asleep in his arms made the William inside him leap for joy.

'_She doesn't trust you William. She's just tired and crushed. Easy to take advantage of. She isn't thinking straight William. You know it._'

'_I don't believe you. I think she sees something in me. I think she understands that there are shades of grey out there._'

'_Always the romantic. Ok, have your fun for now. But if I get hungry, it's your damn fault that I eat her!_'

Buffy nuzzled her head against his chest, clinging at his shirt as her eyebrows scrunched and her nose crinkled. "Stop. Angel. Hurting," she mumbled, rubbing her forehead against his shirt. "Love." She pulled on Spike, hugging him tighter to her.

'_See. She still loves Angel. She always will. Face it William. You're beneath-_'

"My William," she mumbled, smiling as she inhaled his scent before falling into a peaceful slumber.

Spike only smiled as he began to roll the two of them back into his room, locking the door behind him. It was as he was tucking her into his bed. As he pulled off his boots and shirt and curled up next to his golden goddess, his beautiful princess, he realized he wouldn't mind spending five hundred twenty five thousand six hundred minuets lying next to her.

**The End**


End file.
